Saturday, October 31, 2009
in the dark
touches like snakes
but contact nonetheless
my only festival
at my bars
before dying eyes
half-moon smiles dancing
across goddess faces
as if my pain were some kind of joke
and all I can do is smile back
For this is Halloween...
(A horror beyond all reckoning)
Note: The first edit of this was really, really bad. And silly. Sorry about that.
Friday, October 30, 2009
Billy was the middle kid. They locked him in a closet.
As Alec became older, he went to college, studied law and became a partner at his firm. He had sex with many prostitutes, even though he was married to a supermodel from Brazil. Generally, he would drink expensive drinks on his yacht and invite all of his old college buddies to admire the sexy women he surrounded himself with. Charles went on to high school and became quite the football player as well. All the girls loved him too and he dated the head cheerleader. He also won several awards for his art, which was inspired heavily by Picasso.
They moved Billy from the closet to a refrigerator. It was in the basement.
Alec died in the middle of having sex with many prostitutes. Charles died after a woman obsessed with his art stabbed him in the neck with a steak knife while he was eating dinner in Chicago.
Billy was still in the refrigerator, although he was now bones and lived in the junkyard. His body was found by a local homeless man, who was scrounging through the trash. Billy made national news and became world famous.
The world's most famous boy skeleton. The middle kid of the Gray family.
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
Monday, October 19, 2009
We Interrupt This Diary of A Spaghetti Dominatrix For A Paid Advertisement From "The Cheese Mistress"
turning my slaves into cheese.
Want some Parmasan?
Friday, October 16, 2009
Dave Grazer straightened his tie, tilted his hat, hefted his briefcase and walked toward the black hole of nothingness. He had often been warned not to go into the black hole, even as a child. His mother said, "Don't go into the black hole. If you do, God will kill you." But other kids had gone in the black hole, and they turned out fine. They would drip out of the sky, cocooned in slimy armor, wires fraying from their heads, bright red gashes ripped into their asses. But they seemed ok. They seemed at peace with their mangled noses and glassy eyes full of wonder and vacancy.
Dave decided he was tired of being in middle-management, so he figured the black hole couldn't be so bad. He dipped his foot in, felt the piercing blackness swallow it up. Then he changed his mind. He didn't want to go into the black hole anymore. But his foot had already went in. So when Dave retracted his foot, it was no longer there. Phantom toes wiggled, but no foot. Just a clean, surgical cut. No blood, just like his leg was tofu.
A couple of minutes later, Dave's toes dropped from thin air. Bleeding from a purple tear in the sky, his toes trickled onto the pavement, pieces of his Italian loafers still grafted on. The toes wriggled on the ground like dying worms, many neon colored wires jutting, stamps of strange alien tongues on the toenails.
Dave hobbled over to his toes, scooped them up and put them in his pocket. He decided he'd listen to his mother from now on.
But she WAS wrong about the portal to Hell. It wasn't quite as hot as he'd expected.
*originally posted at The New Absurdist
Thursday, October 15, 2009
Sunday, October 11, 2009
Saturday, October 10, 2009
Thursday, October 1, 2009
The Machine was beautiful
its blades so sharp
they drew your conscience
along with blood
all cogs working
in military unison
for the betterment
of the victim
not quite human
but still alive
And that was all that mattered